When "I can't grow a plant if you paid me", meets "I really really want a Chia pet for Christmas"

Ah, plants. You'd think with the fact that I have somehow managed to nurture and care for three children as well as a dog, or the fact that I am the oldest of 10 and have been babysitting or watching children in some form or another for over 20 years, or maybe  the fact that the career I have chosen is based on caring and nurturing, that this somehow would have given me an edge on the whole gardening skill. But, alas, as poor Chia Shrek found out, this is just not the case. I can't grow anything. We actually have one living plant in our entire house and if it weren't for Chris' diligence in watering it, it would have died years ago.

Chia Shrek was a Christmas gift to Alex who was soooo excited to watch him grow. And now,  nearly 2 months later (yes, we tried to grow him beginning on Christmas Day), I think we need to just let it go. Of course, we stopped watering him about a month ago when we realized all we were doing was just prolonging the inevitable and getting Alex's hopes up just to be dashed. However, in the busy-ness of life, he has sat on our kitchen counter, staring, almost mocking us, waiting for a decision. Today I think I have looked at this sad creature long enough. So- sorry Shrek and sorry Alex. Perhaps I should just stick to humans and animals (mostly humans).